Date:	2012-12-21 23:59
Subject:	(no subject)
Security:	Public

Sorry, friends only for the most part. Comment if you know me.

15 Comments | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-06-27 21:32 Subject: BEST WEEK EVAR Security: Public

hurray! for the jenny zhao and the kitty tusk rose.
<3

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-05-08 22:10 Subject: try to set the night on fiiiiiireeee Security: Public

dude.






jaida must read my journal. i am convinced of it.
YES.



here are some things I've been meaning to do but keep putting off. Also known as - THINGS I MUST DO.
-email people about research
-call umhs about volunteering
-fill out and send form for standardized patient thing
-STUDY for the damn mcat....goddammit
-rip cds and records that don't belong to me
-return said cds and records to rightful owner = boy.
-buy every single smiths album on cd.
-buy a music stand
-find a cheap, hungry, (preferably collegiate) cello teacher. (yea...trying to get back to that...Ha)
-rejoice in the fact that i have weekends free from work starting sunday, may 11th
-buy my mom something nice and thoughtful (since she refuses to do the normal thing and let me buy her brunch).
-listen to every new record i've gotten and haven't gotten around to.
-try to find a slim id case that does not have AFI insignia embellishing it.
-plan the reward for after mcats (perhaps a skip across the pond with la madre unit)
-find things to utilize summertime that are fruitful and enjoyable.
-find housing for the fall.
-pick out classes for the fall.


i think that's all for now. .... there's bound to be more. I always think of new things that i have to do while i'm driving. which isn't useful because i can't write it down. so i forget by the time i reach home because i think i've developed early onset alzheimer's.
i've been killing all my dendrite connections with drugs.
dammit.


dude, though. I'm so excited about next year.
it's the best.

1 Comment | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date:	2008-05-07 22:35
Subject:	(no subject)
Security:	Public

WHY IS THERE NOT A NEW SHOEBOX????!

it's one of the only reasons i check livejournal.

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date:	2008-04-16 21:45
Subject:	(no subject)
Security:	Public

I'd like to lead a life sans cliche.

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date:	2008-04-13 11:13
Subject:	(no subject)
Security:	Public

OMG! It's definitely snowing...WHYYYYYY.

TO DO LIST:
1) Kill the state of Michigan
2) Finish my CV.
3) Email said CV to 10+ prospective employers.
4) Shower/get ready/ go to work.
5) Try not to kill people at work.
6) Print art from Caravaggio - Picasso.
7) Study for Art exam (hah).
8) Flash cards for psych.
9) Study for Orgo quiz. Study for Orgo exam #5. Study for Orgo final.
10)Apply for volunteering.
11)Review notes from MCAT class.
12)First MCAT full length.
13)Homework for Monday's MCAT.
14)Get in to Ann Arbor.
15)Summer! (even though it started snowing today. *shakes fist*)

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-04-08 21:02 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

I've been in the habit of damaging cells. I like my music LOUD in the car, to the point where if you were to pull up next to me at a red light and we both had our windows up, you'd still hear every dulcet note of Morrissey singing. I've calculated that I spend 12 hours (10% of my waking hours) in the car. 40% of which are devoted to listening to music (the other 60% is my undying devotion to national public radio). That is still a LOT of hours to inflict damage upon my cochlear hair cells.

I've also been in the habit of half-assing papers. It's working out rather well for me though. I half-assed - no, quarter-assed - a paper for my art history class and managed a 92% on it. It's rather encouraging in a sadistic sense that other students in my class might have spent 10 times the amount of time I spent on it and yet only managed a 78%. Oh, how I love and loathe thee, UMD.

Speaking of papers, however, I have a 10 page research paper due in Russian history on Thursday on a book I have not yet started. It could be panic inducing if not for my lovely friend, Spark Notes. Mr. Notes has been a dear comrade in my times of need in high school and I'm sure he will prove more that helpful in this endeavor.

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-03-19 23:23 Subject: It's been 5 years... Security: Public

Can we please stop it? now??!

Also, I love my house in Northville if only for the bounciness of the bed.

2 Comments | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-03-17 23:23 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

When I'm older, I think I'll celebrate St. Patty's all out. I'll take the day off work (cuz I sure as hell won't be in school), wake up at 5 am like the kid in my MCAT class did, and drink ALL day...until 4 am. Friends will just drift in and out and I'll move from bar to bar to party to party. It will be the day that doesn't exist past that day. Kind of like how my manager has 10 years of blur where he doesn't remember anything. That's a long time to be continuously inebriated. No wonder he thinks 'modalities' isn't a real word. Silly.

As you might have inferred, I have not gone out on this night of debauchery. In fact, I've been a good girl. Which is more than I can say about myself this weekend and some of last week. Hey, I've always said I'll try anything once. It's been great fun. I remember driving home on Saturday night/Sunday Morning at 3 am with heightened awareness of my surroundings, hoping that I'll never forget that night. I've already started to, but I'm trying to hold on to the important bits. It's such a weird feeling to be detached from yourself and then reattach. Everything feels twice as real.

It's also very boring without myspace and facebook in my life. I've been checking LJ continuously to make up for it, but it's not even half as interesting. Which is saying a lot.

I just got a reminder from my Art History teacher about our test tomorrow that I haven't started to study for. Goddamn it.

But keeping with the spirit, I hope all of you have been/are drunk off your fookin' arses. I have an Irish cheer for you. "Here's to you and here's to me. I pray that friends we'll always be, but if by chance we disagree, the hell with you and here's to me!" And another cheeky one, "Here's to our husbands and our boyfriends. May they never meet."

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-03-09 22:20 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

I hate birthdays. Mine. Yours. Everybody's. It's so hyped up and usually a let down.
I'm sorry.

I'm sick of being somebody for everyone else. I think that other than my friends at Emory, I'm totally myself with less that five people in my life. Which is pretty sad, still. Even at Emory though, when I went to visit I was the outsider. I don't even belong there, anymore. I think I'll try to just be and not care. it's tough because people don't care about people like that. Perhaps it's just better to accept it for what it is. Maybe I'll just never have more than a few people I'm close with. Maybe I will be that hermit of my high school prophesies. It sucks.

I'm also sick of my face.
and my personality.
and my stupidity and apathy and lethargy and arrogance and selfishness.

My body's broken I think. No. I think my brain is inhibited more than anyone else's. I can't even achieve the most primitive of bodily responses.

There's really nothing good about being good, kids. Or 'nice'. Takes me back to the end of 8th grade when most people when evaluating me could only think of the ever so descriptive adjective, 'nice'. or 'smart'. I hate that too. I'm nothing more. good nice smart. They get you nowhere. I have no solid interests nor any friends with common interests. Just common experiences. Which is a lot weaker bond than the former.

goddamn it all.

1 Comment | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-02-24 22:15 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Why do people procreate?!

The Oscars suck. If I had the opportunity, some of these movies would not be considered among the best movies of the year. Movies are why people suck.


But Edward Norton is love. And American History X is incredible.

1 Comment | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-02-23 01:17 Subject: A day in the life... Security: Public

Woke up, fell out of bad. Dragged a comb across my head. Found my way downstairs and drank a cup, and looking up, I noticed I was late. Found my coat and grabbed my hat. Made the bus in seconds flat. Found my way upstairs and had a smoke. Somebody spoke and I went into a dream...

I slept for about 12 hours. Got home from the last day of hell week yesterday, not before skipping out of Russian early and hanging with my boi. Apparently, I'm dating a twelve-year-old, newly pubescent boy. I love it. Anyway, reached home at around 11 and had some yummy foccacia bread and went to sleep. Woke up at 11:45 this morning. it was amazing. I decided to skip Psych today because it's better to do that than be bitter about people for the rest of the day. I doubt we did anything worth attending today. Probably talked about Eeyore some more. Instead, I woke up late and then watched Lost from last night. I went to work at 3 and on the way, listened to the Smiths - awesome. Had to explain to numerous customers that we're filing bankrupcy and that we couldn't accept their damn merchandise credits or gift cars. Had some pissed off customers but meh. I secretly want our location to close and I feel awful for our manager and certain other associates who rely on this job for their living. I guess it's selfish, in a way because then I won't have to quit in the summer. I can't wait for the summer. How great! Hung out at the Maniak's with JP and his friends after closing, but had to leave cuz I told my mom I would. aaaaaand fin.

I don't have to work tomorrow and it's the first day of break (not counting today because technically I would have had school). Fun!

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date:	2008-02-20 23:18
Subject:	I know how to pick 'em.
Security:	Public

Sharper Image filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy this morning, sending its already battered shares down another 65% at the open.

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-02-20 01:56 Subject: Caviar and Cigarettes Security: Public

Here I am working on my Russian paper for Exceptionalism vs. Westernism when it struck me that I'm in desperate need of a holiday. And of summer. It's been entirely too long. So, since Michigan winters and lack of funds means I can have neither, I've decided to party for the next week. Saturday night was fun, anyway. Here's to more of those nights. And less of the consequence.

And one special boy who's des molecules charmantes, as they say in Français. at least as Jenny says in Français. It could all be lies.

I need to clean my room and I need to get some sleep and I need to start studying for an Orgo exam happening tomorrow night. But this wikipedia entry on the Mensheviks beckons and I must finish this paper, before everything else.

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-02-05 21:35 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

apple bottom jeans. boots with the fur. the whole club was looking at her. she hit the floor. (she hit the floor). next thing you know. shorty got low. low. low. low. low. low. low.

2 Comments | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-01-28 22:05 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

Many stores in the mall are having a "We're-Not-Doing-That-Great" Sale. Gadzooks is having a 'buy one get one FREE' sale. The Calendar Store went out with a bang today with their 'Everything is $4' sale. You should embark on an opportunistic trip like the sale hungry fiends you are. And while doing so, also visit me in that corner store in between Sears and Macys. We're having sales too. But you'll be there to gawk at me, of course.

I feel like I can't breathe.

It's weird. I'll be walking through the mall or at school and unbidden, thoughts of family life pop into my head. Having babies, being married. Stuff that's never been important before. And it scares me because I'll be sourly disappointed. It's too soon anyway. It always is. Yet, I feel like I'll never get out of here. I'll be lying in this same position 10 years from now procrastinating work for what will be my 12th year in college. Being yelled at. The kids in my psych class are so dumb. This kid kept misusing 'affect' and I wanted to punch him in the nose. It feels like I'll never belong. In college and with people. I'll get along with everyone and somehow it makes no difference. I don't know what I want. I also can't express myself enough to people when I do know what I want. It sounds too demanding. "I want you to make me something to eat" or "I want you to let me be" or "Talk to me" or "Shut up" or "I want you to spend more time with me and I'm sorry if I don't make enough time for you". I can't be everywhere and with everyone at once, no matter how much I wish I could. And then people will get mad. I don't remember when exactly it got this hard, but I don't think other people have quite a hard time with it. There's so much I could be angry at but it quickly passes that and right into sadness. I'm so done with that after these two years.

I have an orgo exam on wednesday. It seems like I always have an orgo exam.

when will it be over?

3 Comments | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date:	2008-01-12 15:52
Subject:	(no subject)
Security:	Public

I suppose if losing anything were to kill me, it'd be losing my memories.

And that is a very good thing. To me, that's an indication of a life well lived. With no regrets and not wanting to go back to redo anything. It hasn't been perfect but it's been the best.

1 Comment | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date:	2008-01-07 02:12
Subject:	(no subject)
Security:	Public

argh.

1 Comment | Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2008-01-01 11:39 Subject: 2007/2008 Security: Public

= 0.999501992
I find it odd that there have been only 29 entries since January 1st 2007. Especially in such a hectic and roller coaster year. I suppose writing every single event isn't as cathartic as it used to be. Or maybe it is that I can't really find time or effort to completely express everything I've been going through. Suffice it to say that it's been a rocky (haha Rocky) couple of months. It's getting better.

I hope all of you had a prosperous 2007. Hurray for a year that is a multiple of 2, 4, and 8....if that makes any difference.

( . )

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link

Date: 2007-12-15 22:32 Subject: (no subject) Security: Public

It seems like a month or two has passed since yesterday. I think I had my orgo exam last night....

i can't wait until monday at 6.
ooooand next saturday.
:)

and.

hopefully i'll be in school next semester. :/

Comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend | Link